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Self-confidence is an attitude, which allows individuals to have a positive yet reliable view of themselves. Self-confident people trust their own abilities and have a positive outlook.
People who are not self confident often depend on excessive approval from others. They can also avoid taking risks because of their fear of failure.
Many factors contribute to our sense of self-confidence.
Parents attitudes impact on the way children feel about themselves.
If one or both parents are excessively critical, over demanding or overprotective, children may believe they are incapable, inadequate or inferior.
Our relationships as we grow up e.g. social , school, work, can also impact on our sense of self belief, and the ability to take control of our lives.
There are numerous therapeutic approaches to help improve self-confidence. One is to recognise the learned ‘automatic thoughts’ that are destructive, and to challenge and reframe these. Such thoughts often revolve around assumptions about approval, performance, and perfection.
Self defeating thought patterns include ‘all or nothing’ thoughts e.g. shoulds, musts, magnifying the negatives, and generalisations such as ‘always’, ‘never.’ etc
Other approaches involve recognising and accepting personal strengths, acknowledging needs, identifying‘ healthy’ feelings and being able to express these feelings constructively,
Mindfulness approaches are also helpful to learn to focus in the ‘now’, to observe and be aware of what is in our present, rather than be constrained by precepts such as ‘self.’
  • Unit 10, 35 Riccarton Road
    Christchurch 8011
    New Zealand

    Phone: (03) 348 5595